Friday, August 27, 2010

Winds of Change

Change is in the air. This morning fall seems to be sitting on my doorstep. The air is crisp and chilly. Flowers are leaving their season to rest or to fade until replaced in the spring. A few of the maple trees have begun to color and a humming bird sits perched in the arbor vitae expecting a full feeder over the flowerless months. Change is indeed in the air.

With the struggling economy, my daughter and I find it will easier for us both if we move in together. A sign of the times for many families. My granddaughters are thrilled. Going to Grammy's just got easier. Sleepovers will happen every night. Grams is just a bedroom away.

My daughter and I have not always had the easiest relationship. This will be a new experience for us both working together as a team for the well-being of the children and ourselves. The winds of change will push us to a new level of evolution in this mother/daughter scenario. Apprehensive? Yes. Nervous. Yes.

"I get to send them home to their parents." Yes, all of you grandparents have said this at one time or another. "I get to send them to grandma." Yes, all of you parents have said that as well. Space. We all want our space, our time alone. For me, this has been something I have treasured. I raised my children and love having my grandchildren, but my space has been paradise with no conflict, no clutter, no constant raising of children. The winds of change.

My daughter and I both left marriages taking little with us thinking that we were protecting the children from conflict. Our financial situations did not protect our children but made us all vulnerable to the struggle of a once stay-at-home mom trying to make her way in order to give her children a stable home. A mom always living on the edge of poverty. So now mother and daughter work together trying to financially make it work.

Together we have searched and searched for a place to live finding that we do not qualify for much. How do you find a safe home, a home that your children are proud of, a place close to their schools when money is not an available. How do you find a job when you are 63 and there are no jobs? Winds of change, change not expected.

One thing I do have despite the stack of things I do not is my positive attitude. A little bit of tolerance with a dash of humor and a bowl full of laughter can move mountains. I could list the drawbacks versus the positives, but already I know that the positives would outweigh those things knocking at the door.

I am blessed with an opportunity to build a new relationship with my daughter. I am blessed to have this time with my granddaughters. I am blessed to know that our faith, our courage, our dedication to these children will give them the security and love they need.

No, I will no longer have my space, but I will have a new adventure. Bring it on, winds, we'll meet you head on and win.


  1. I am sure that you will rise to any challenges that your new situation brings, and you will treasure all the special moments with your grands. When you have a few months under your belt, I'd love for you to write about it for my website. This is something that so many people have considered, and yet there is not that much info out there about how to pull it off.

  2. I can almost see those flowers fading and feel the crisp air on my cheeks but alas! Here in Virginia the only air on my cheeks is hot and humid. Love your blog, my friend. It makes me smile. xoxox ps

  3. i LOVE the picture of your sleeping granddaughters! there's nothing sweeter than seeing a loved one asleep. keep the faith, dear pam. nothing happens by mistake in God's world. you will learn and grow, no matter what the direction of the wind.


  4. Susan, I look forward to writing for you and am honored that you would ask. I love your site and your support is so appreciated. I certainly will need moral support for our upcoming move.

    Patty, my dear friend, you should have stayed in Oregon then you could avoid that hot, humid state, where my sister also resides. Miss you on a regular basis.

  5. YaYa, I know your words are true. I am in good Hands. Thank you for your kind words.