Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Little Diplomat

"Grammy, I have to tell you something." Gabby's words couldn't escape lips fast enough. "Mommy said that you can't come to my play, but I asked the teacher, and she said you could come. Mommy won't believe me, but I will tell her to call my teacher. So you come, Grammy." Whew, kids talk fast.

Evidently I had been uninvited to the play that the 2nd graders were performing since Mommy and Daddy are now both able to make the performance.

"Mommy thought three people would be too many if everyone in the class brought three. But our room is big. You can come."

What a thrill for a grandparent to know that a grandchild wants you to be there even if it means asking the teacher. I understand my daughter's thinking. I would like her to think a bit more about my feelings, but that is the way of it. I was no different back when my children were young? What blinders kept me from looking beyond my tunnel vision?

I remember being a single mother strapped for money and time. My children seemed to get only what was leftover of a working mother. I can hardly remember their days in school and wonder how much I missed. After so many years of unhappy, I wanted happy. It was not an easy life.

After a deep dip into depression, I picked myself up and decided that I needed to change. I wanted a change for my children, a change in a small family. If one of them wanted to play, we played. If there was an event, we picked and went. I found energy and a new life in my children. My ex said to me after my metamorphous, "You've changed. I don't like you this way." I promptly informed him that he didn't like me the other way either, but I liked the new, improved me.

We rush through life grabbing what we can of career, wealth, possessions. We look for someone who will like us better than we like ourselves. We want that classic castle and Prince Charming. Well, folks, there are no Prince Charmings only men searching for happiness just like us. We hope they can accept us with our many flaws and believe we can eradicate theirs. (Just kidding.)

Today I will sit in a classroom watching Gabby do her part in "Stone Soup" and "Stellaluna". She will look at me and smile knowing she managed to get me into her performance. She will smile knowing the special relationship we share and the pride I have in her.

Gabby managed to smuggle her grammy into her show, but more than that, she learned to be a diplomat.

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