Sunday, January 3, 2010

Mesmerized

Mesmerized I sat at the traffic light watching the trees. They moved to an unheard melody that made them dance in unison. I knew the light would change soon and would take me away from this display of movement. For just a moment, I thought I heard their song.

As a kid I would sit by the fireplace with my dad watching the flames reach for the flue. He would tell me stories of the past. I would listen. We talked of the dancing fire in shades of red….yellow….blue. At Camp Sugar Grove we walked past the girls cabins down the path to the campfire circle. There we sang Kum Ba Yah and Kookaberra. Stories were told as we watched sparks fly into the darkness. The fire warmed us and took us more deeply into ourselves.

The beautiful Pacific Ocean does that for me. As waves fade and roll back to the open sea, they form once more bringing me back again as they kisses the shore. I’m not sure what holds me there, but I cannot look away. As I walk the beach, I sing at the top of my lungs and often shed tears of sorrow or of the overwhelming feelings embracing me as I realize the power of God. I cannot look away even though I am not sure what I am seeking out there in the blue.

I guess I do the same with the sky wondering what lies out there in the darkness full of twinkling lights. The realization that I’m sitting on a ball floating in the mass of space pulls me back to the reality of the fragility of this globe that holds our lives.

Mesmerized.

The same feelings grab hold of me when I look at my grandchildren. Sometimes I want to cry at the depth of loving. I want to hold on to each moment replaying these fleeting glimpses that will some day pass away to other moments just as precious. How often did I hold my children’s small hands and feet marveling at these perfect miniatures? A kiss of a downy head and am as touched as if I viewed a mountain vista, the roaring ocean, a volcano fresh from eruption.

Mesmerized. I should have been an adventurer.

1 comment:

  1. Wonderful post, Pamela. I do find there is something wonderfully nurturing and healing all at the same time about nature. My grandchildren make me happy in a similar way, happy but tired!

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