Monday, July 20, 2009

Grandma!

1998. My daughter came to my house to announce her pregnancy, I stammered and tried desperately to sort through these sudden overwhelming feelings I had thrust on me. Grandma? Was I old enough to be a grandma? Of course, I was 51 so that was a given. Who wanted to date a woman who was a grandma?! Could the kids afford to have a baby now? A baby! Wow, a baby.

A few months later, I no longer needed to sort through my feelings. The following is the letter I wrote to our family and friends:

Dear All,

I'm writing a rather generic letter to all of those people I love to let you know the news. Around Mar 28 our family will be blessed with a beautiful baby girl. Last night we got our first-hand glimpse at this little sweetheart.

She has two tiny feet about the size of a finger tip and little hands that grasp and float gracefully waving to her unseen family. For the last time through translucent flesh, we saw each and every rib, vertebrae, bone in her fragile frame. Her little heart has all four chambers. I know because we saw them all working together beating a new live into existence. We looked into her tiny skull and saw a wonderful place to store memories, dreams, faces, places, wisdom, knowledge and love. She was curled up with her little butt in the air just like her mommy slept when she was a baby. Then we saw her face, tiny and beautiful. She would peek then hide then peek again. Tiny little eyes, a little turned up nose and a pouty mouth resembling another.

We saw your niece, your cousin, your friend, your grandniece, your great-granddaughter. Her mother smiled. Her father asked questions anxiously wanting to know that she is as perfect as she appeared. Her grandmama yammered like a silly goose and fought the tears she felt seeing a new generation carrying on for the generations before and those to come.

Last night I spent about 30 minutes with my new granddaughter. I wanted to tell her all the things of this earth to discover, to hear music, to feel love, to lie in the grass and watch the clouds, to touch, to see, to learn about the other inhabitants of this planet. Puppies, snowflakes, birthday presents and giggling.

Thank God we have all of you to give this small one your love, your uniqueness, so that her life might be richer.

Just wanted to spread the news. It's a girl. Of course, a girl still in progress and still a bit nameless, but we saw her and wanted to let you know.

Love,
Grammy

March 11, 1999, Sydney was born. I became a grandma. Grandma. I've never been called anything lovelier.